20 Thoughts I Have Walking to and From Work in New York City

Yes! So glad work is over. I am going Ho-oooome.

I know her feet must hurt in those heels.

I wonder what I’m having for dinner tonight.

Why doesn’t anyone abide by the stay to your right rule?

It’s so hot.

Is it really smart for me to have my phone in my hand? Or should I put it in my bag? Maybe I’ll just clutch it really tight, and then if someone tries to snatch it I can punch them, and the blow will be worse because of the force of the phone.

Ugh. I want to go home. Why hasn’t anyone invented a way to teleport home yet?

Really? You’re going to walk directly in the middle of the sidewalk at your most leisurely pace?

Why are there so many people???

I can’t do this.

Mmm smells like yummy food.

Gross, is that pee I smell?

Aww they’re holding hands, I miss my boyfriend.

Lol at this woman next to me attempting to jog in heels, only to give up after 3 strides, and is still at the same pace that I am. You’re not going anywhere any faster.

Uh oh here goes the same construction worker who always compliments me or says good morning. Do I pretend not to see him, or just say hi?

If there was a power walking competition I could def win.

Oooo, cute dress.

What if they made phones collapsible so they’re easy to hide in your hands or pockets from thieves? Nevermind. That’s a stupid idea.

I wonder if I can make this light… Mmmmm. Nope, not going to try it. [Cars don’t start driving for another 10 seconds] Dang! I definitely could’ve made it.

Ahh. I can’t believe I live here.

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